Well I love graveyards... they are so peaceful! They are gardens(well at least that’s what I call them); a very different kind of garden then the ones we maintain in our yards but equally beautiful. It was not until meeting my best friend that I realized how serene graveyards really are. My best friend, Joy, always use to point out how lovely all of the ancient rocks in scripted with lovely sayings were. At first I found it quite dark and creepy; but now I realize she is right. A graveyard is a place where there are memorials of a thousand beautiful souls with a thousand silver stones marking there place for eternity. People can come here to ponder their own lives or the lives of those who are no longer with us. At first glance a graveyard may be a sad and scary place knowing that six feet under your very own feet lie dead bodies. But the great thing about Joy is her soul is so loving that even the most strangest of things have beauty to them. I am discovering the hardest part of giving up drinking is going to be giving up the weekends I spend with her. I have never laughed so hard(excuse me, peed my pants so much) as I have when I am with her. I have been best friends with her since I was 16 and never once got in a fight with her. I know that we will remain friends even though I will not be bar hopping with her on the weekends, but all the same I still fear I will no longer be fun in her eyes. It really scares me that we will drift apart. I know I have been writing a lot about my decision not to drink anymore, but it is a big decision I have made in my life. I have decided not to tell many people about going to AA meetings and that I am not drinking anymore, so this is kind of my release. I know it has only been ten days but it feels like I have to learn how to be at peace with a part of me that is dying in order to have a new me being reborn. But as dark as it sounds I have a feeling the new me is going to be a lot of fun!
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