loss of words...

Well i do not really know what to write this week. Considering this is really my only free time to write this entry before friday i am just going to have to think of something.  Im hoping that not too many people are reading this because they have to click on a link to get here rather than easily just commenting on someone who is actually on the forum.  I have been incredibly personal in my entries, which is really not like me.  However, in my life right now my priorities are sobriety, class, work.  So if it takes me embarressing myself on my blog to keep me sober it is worth it.  This week my sponsor told me I am on step 3. Of course this makes me happy.  I have found out that this entire time i thought i was very patient i am not.  I want to perfectly adhere to all of the steps, so that i can reach 'enlightenemnt' as soon as possible.  This is not how the program works. The beauty of it and the entire reason it does work is because it takes years to understand these tweleve simple steps. Sitting back and leaving it to my higher powers will is crucial. The beauty of each step is the things they allow me to learn about myself. Everyday i find out new strengths i have, many new weaknesses, and i am finally clear headed enough to take on one at a time.  Something i really did not see coming when i first decided to stop drinking is that instead of loosing friends, im gaining them. Now these friends are most certaintly not 21, like myself. However i think they might care about me more then almost everyone in my life prior to sobriety. And while i am grateful for all of this, right now i am tired as fuck, and irritated. :)